Wednesday, December 15, 2010

The perfect excuse

Having been single for a while before meeting A. I was used to figuring things out by myself. And this includes finding excuses not to do things I didn't want to do. Like, for example, skipping that dinner with the annoying coworker, or scheduling the later than 8am Saturday meeting, or... mostly innocent stuff but things people get really annoyed at if you just say up front that you don't want to do it their way.

And then I met A. and we started going out. And then suddenly, without knowing this was happening, I found the perfect excuse for everything! It started by actual statements like:
- Hey, can you help me clean my house at 8am on Sunday?
- Sorry... My boyfriend...

And I realized that before I finished the sentence people were usually nodding and saying something like "I understand". Wow! It is amazing! Even if what I meant to say was "My boyfriend and I could help you at 9am though", people did not expect anything out of me as soon the reference to a male came out. And so I got hooked... even if before I really disliked women that used their "guys" as excuses, I suddenly understood how much easier it is than coming up with a new excuse each time. So if someone asked or suggested some lame activity and/or lame time A. would be suggested and the matter was settled in my favor.
Don't you think it is amazing how this works so well? And, I also know it works for A. using me as the boring and controlling girlfriend/wife when he doesn't want to do something. So at least it goes both ways! And I think I now understand why my mom blamed us (kids) when she did not want to accept some invitation... maybe it works even better then!


  1. Yup this works so well! I used the "My Husband.." so many times here in India, they don't need to hear anymore, having a husband is enough of an excuse for a woman not to be out too late, not to work late at night, a free card to come in slightly late to office, a good excuse to turn down a boring freelance translation.
    Then I found out that "pregnancy" work just as well if not better LOL the first few months you might have to remind people that you "Simply can't do it because you are preggo and get tired" But then as you start showing you don't even have to say anything, people stop asking assuming you are taking rest and can't do a thing, and if you plan a day trip you actually have friends asking you five gazillion time if you are actually "fine about going out"
    Now I have husband and a baby, so I really can get out of just about anything annoying :-P

  2. I heard someone wise say that true freedom is the ability to Say NO without giving an excuse! Guess that person is so right.

  3. Muito bom esse blog!